I Procrastinate so Hard

Boys and girls, I have a story to tell you. If you want to read it, do not, I REPEAT, do not exit from this page. Do not skim read, do not take a break to eat that cheap College peanut butter & Jelly sandwich.

This is a little insight into my life’s story. Buckle up because this will be a pretty bumpy ride (I am exaggerating though, but still better safe than sorry, am I right or am I right). Okay here I go, so I am new to blogging and, so I am still not sure what my platform should be and what audience I want to attract. I am a Christian, I play Pokémon, I enjoy reading and I am following the growing market change to self-driving cars by 2030. I have been told that I am confusing.

But trying to figure out my platform is not the only thing I am trying to figure out. I procrastinate heavily. I want to become a blogger, weather it makes me money or not. However, ever since I decided to dedicate time to blog, I decided I would start training Pokémon and becoming a Champion (such a nerd). I bought a 750-piece puzzle (my friend told me this is a small puzzle) which has my brain shattered in pieces (puzzles are tough). Also, I decided to binge watch Brooklyn Nine-Nine and I finished it (as nervous Jake Peralta would say, coo coo coo cooo cooo coo coo coool).

Furthermore, I had written a perfect blog a few days ago, it was about my personality. I wrote about how I consider myself to be ‘adrift,’ as dictionary.com puts it, ” without purpose or guidance; lost and confused.”  But I procrastinated to post even that, I had the draft sitting on my computer for a week and finally decided to close the browser without realizing that I had never saved the blog. (So disappointing).

Tomorrow said sarcastically

I want you all to understand how terrible I am when it comes to procrastination. For example, I procrastinated when reading a book called “Procrastination: Why You Do It, What to Do About It Now,” written by Jane B. Burka and Lenora M. Yeun, that I started in 2014. Well it’s 2017 and I have yet to have completed the book. Yeah, it is that bad.

Here is a paragraph directly from the book, and this is something that I would say applies to me. Chapter 2 Fear of Failure, The Procrastinator on Trail. “Many people who procrastinate are apprehensive about being judged by others or by the critic who dwells within. They fear they will be found lacking, their best efforts won’t be good enough, and they won’t meet the mark. This concern reflects a fear of failure, and we believe that procrastination may function as a strategy for coping with this fear.”

It is hard for me to take in criticism because I always feel three steps behind people around my age who are doing well and making smart decisions in their own lives. For some reason I know that I am flawed, but I assume I am more perfect than the common man so when my flaws pointed out, I hiss back like a cat with it’s hairs raised ready to claw back because all I can see is their own imperfections. And lastly, I am afraid of success, I am afraid I will not achieve my own version success.

In conclusion, I am going to attempt to manage my procrastination. It is obvious that the need to procrastinate will not just evaporate, but I want to write, I want to blog, I want to perfect it and I want to grow in it. Therefore, this blog will be posted with all it’s nooks and crannies. Because after all there is beauty in imperfection.

This Is Spotivity




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