I loved her. That’s what I said, as if saying it made it more true. Somewhere on the path of love, I got caught up in myself and forgot about her. Somewhere I became more focused on a love story rather than loving her. The funny thing is, she was only in my life for several months, but now I can not seem to forget about her.
Up until this point, I never really had a first date. And to be honest I did not even realize I was on a date. At the time I just knew I was taking the most beautiful girl out for a cup of coffee. Turns out coffee was not her ‘cup of tea,’ so she got tea instead. As we sat there, we just talked and for the first time in my life I was trying my hardest to listen and take in everything that was being said. I wanted to value everything that she said, as I was also mesmerized by her eyes.
From there we went on dates after dates. However, with my bad memory I do not remember every specific date, but there are some I will never forget. Like going to the haunted house with a really crappy chainsaw clown. It was expensive and boring, but she loved it. We went to numerous parks, gardens and even went stargazing. Honestly, stargazing is one of the most amazing things anyone can do. Sitting up and looking at all the beautiful constellations is just breath-taking.
Dating this girl taught me a lot of things, like I could walk for hours without getting tired. Literally we would meet up at five o’clock in the evening, and walk until midnight. We would walk tirelessly through parks, the city or even to the ends of the earth. Trust me, we walked so much I always had a valid excuse to miss leg day. There was one night, we walked a substantial distance in the cold night of a Canadian winter, I felt as though my toes had caught frost bite.
For me love is addicting and toxic. But, that goes for most folks as human beings were made to give, receive and feel love. At the end of the day things did not work out, but at least I will have the memories. I wrote this because, I have made a lot of friends in the past few years, and sadly I don’t get to see them anymore. And there are some friends I have hurt and some relationships I have lost. Honestly, I wish I did not have the opportunity to ruin those friendships. Lastly, I am addicted to love, and I hate love. Some days, I desire to build a wall around those feelings, for now I can just write about them.
This is Spotivity